Darth Cheney Speaks

WASHINGTON – Vice President Dick Cheney says that his boss, President George W. Bush, has no need to apologize to the American people for not doing more to head off the financial calamity, saying no one saw the crisis coming.

During an interview Thursday with The Associated Press in his West Wing office, Cheney defended the administration's performance on an economy that is growing weaker daily and which recently collapsed in spectacular fashion. Cheney said that "nobody anywhere was smart enough to figure it out."

He said Bush doesn't need to apologize because he has taken "bold, aggressive action."

Translation: We absolutely knew this was coming, god damned Peter Schiff wouldn't keep his trap shut. But that's why we accelerated it so that we could most effectively rob the national treasury of any value it had left so that out friends could all be rich while the country burns. We were very smart indeed; fooled you idiots!

President Bush was the perfect patsy. Dumb as a stump and easily ordered around.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha, fuck you America, I'll be in Paraguay humping all the sheep I can dream of!