Greenspan's Body Count: Adolf Merckle bitte die scheisse

Thanks to Junior Accountant for sending this one. German tycoon Adolf Merckle, "Germany's Warren Buffett," killed himself after his business and family fortune blew up in Greenspan's bubble:

German billionaire Adolf Merckle has committed suicide, in despair over the huge losses suffered by his business empire during the financial crisis, his family said on Tuesday.

The media-shy billionaire, whose family controls some of Germany's best-known companies, was hit by a train on Monday evening, local officials said.

"The desperate situation of his companies caused by the financial crisis, the uncertainties of the last few weeks and his powerlessness to act, have broken the passionate family entrepreneur and he took his own life," a family statement said.

State prosecutors from the southern city of Ulm said Merckle, 74, left work on Monday and died after being hit by a train near the town of Blaubeuren. He left behind a suicide note to his family, they added.

What does that teach you, kiddies? That's right: leverage kills. And extreme leverage kills extremely. Now you might ask yourself why Dick Fuld and Vikram Pandit haven't killed themselves. Silly kids, that's because they are Americans. When rich Americans screw up, the taxpayers bail them out.

Greenspan's Body Count now stands at seventy-one:

Adolf Merckle
Mike Upham
Randy Motts
Kristy Hunt
Joseph Nesheiwat
Tom Brisch
Alex Widmer
Brian Pugh
Marilyn Lewis
Sid Agrawal
Kirk Stephenson
Barry Fox
Dallas Dwayne Carter
David Hetzel
Sharron Hetzel
Cliff Kendall
Pamela Ross
Roland Gore
Mrs. Gore
Wanda Dunn
Karthik Rajaram
Subasri Rajaram
Krishna Rajaram
Ganesha Rajaram
Arjuna Rajaram
Indra Ramasesham
Joe X
Isabelle Jarka
Robert Wagner
Lt. Michael Howe
John Roberts
Palmer C. White
Dianne Pittman White
Ed Boesen
Edwin F. Rachleff
Carlene Balderrama
Troy VanderStelt
Scott M. Coles
Dawn E. Armstrong
Thomas Lizotte
Jonathon Calvin "40-Cal" Jacques
Salvador X
Lupe X
Jade X
Little Boy X
Little Girl X
Kashmir Billon
Bill McMurtry
Lisa McMurtry
James Hahn
Raymond Donaca
Deanna Donaca
[redacted]
[redacted]
Michel Veillette
Nadya Ferrari-Veillette
Marguerite Veillette
Vincent Veillette
Mia Veillette
Jacob Veillette
Maurice Pereira
Natasha Pereira
Mark Achilli
Raed Al-Farah
Andrew Kissel
Rufus Shaw Jr.
Lynn Flint Shaw
Mr. Pierce
Walter Buczynksi
Marci Buczynski
Jason Washington

WC Sports Desk Programming Note

Just a television programming note: tonight from Ladd-Peebles Stadium in Mobile, Alabama is the GMAC Bowl. Yes sports fans, the bowl brought to you by you. GMAC is the crooked loan arm of GM that enabled GM to sell many more cars than they should have by offering loans to the unemployed to buy Chevy 1 tons. Well they obviously were going to go broke until the US of A stepped in to prop them up. So even if you could give a rats ass about Tulsa and Ball State, you, if you're American, are paying for it. So enjoy tonight’s game comrades.

* And a little reminder for those who enjoy sports where judges determine champions such as figures skating, gymnastics, diving and synchronized swimming, Thursday is the college football championship game between Florida and Oklahoma.

See this is funny because each team has lost once. There is a team that is undefeated, Utah, but they weren't given the opportunity to play in this game. They played in another game and spanked the team that was voted no.1, Alabama, for many weeks this year. But the votes weren't there to justify they being in a national championship game.

So fans of Christie Yamaguchi and Brian Boitano, enjoy your championship college game. I believe the Czech judge has already awarded Oklahoma a 7.8 which is quite controversial.

A little more Apple BS

"Schiller also said 3.4 million customers visit Apple stores each week. "

Are you kidding me, so in a year 176.8 MILLION people visit Apple stores? Well done Apple!

Kathy Griffin on CNN New Years Eve

This is pretty funny. Not Alec Baldwin berating his daughter funny, or Celine Dion take a kayak funny, but still pretty good.

Bad idea #214

Self-service tequila samples

A penny saved is two pennies earned

A penny saved is most decidedly not a penny earned. Thanks to the miracle of assrapedly high tax rates, it's almost two pennies.

Consider the marginal taxes of Joe, a middle-income earner (single making $34000+ or married making $68000+):

25% Federal income tax
6.2% Social Security tax
1.45% Medicare tax

Now put our unfortunate Joe in the socialist state of California, and add:

9.3% California income tax
1.1% State disability tax

That makes a marginal tax rate of 43.05%. It would be even worse if Joe was self-employed, having to pay both sides of Social Security and Medicare taxes, for a total marginal tax rate of 50.7%, but for now we'll assume his employer is eating that part.

Let's say Joe wants to buy a $100 pair of jeans. California sales tax is generally 7.75% to 8.25%, varying by county and city. So that $100 pair of jeans will cost Joe $108. And how much did Joe have to earn to take home that $108? The 43.05% marginal tax rate means Joe takes home 56.95% of his pay. $108 divided by 56.95% is $190, meaning Joe has to earn $190 to pay for a $100 pair of jeans. $100 saved is $190 earned.

Cut your spending by $100 a week, and it's equivalent to giving yourself at least a $150 per week raise, even if you're in a much better state than California. And in the coming depression, it's going to be a lot easier to cut your spending $100 than raise your income $150.

Who the F is calmo?

And whence spring these delicious comments? If calmo had a blog, I would light some candles, drop a tab, and read it daily.