True Hollywood Story: Crazy Chinese Business Suit Guy

If you've spent much time in San Francisco, you've probably run into this guy.



I first saw him in the late 90's, walking up and down Market Street in a business suit with a similar sign about impeaching Clinton and Bush. Lately, he favors more casual attire and music festivals and political gatherings.

Now, here's the True Hollywood Story:

Frank Chu (born March 24, 1960) is one of San Francisco’s best-known eccentrics. His protests against US Presidents, corporations, and the 12 Galaxies have been held in San Francisco and nearby locales since at least 1995. Chu has been compared to Joshua A. Norton, an earlier famous San Francisco eccentric.

Chu lives in Oakland, California and commutes daily to San Francisco where he can find the largest audience of passers-by and television news crews to share his thoughts with. He supports himself through a combination of state aid, sign sponsorships and small donations from his supporters.

From his beginnings as a young desperado...

In early 1985, Chu, then 24 years old, took 11 members of his family hostage in his home in Oakland and was reported to have been beating some with his fists. Chu fired a .38 pistol at one police officer who came to investigate, but missed. Police cordoned off a ten-block area for three hours. Chu eventually released his hostages and surrendered to the police. He says that he was acting in self-defense.

... to crusading exposer of intergalactic conspiracies:

Frank Chu holds Bill Clinton responsible for directing the CIA to withhold payment to him for being the star of something called "The Richest Family" during the presidency of George H.W. Bush. His protests frequently called for the impeachment of Clinton even after Clinton was no longer in office. Bill Clinton and various other US presidents are frequently accused by Chu of cooperating with the 12 Galaxies to commit crimes and treasons. Chu is strongly interested in television reporters and newscasters, who will bring him the publicity he requires to inform the world of the injustices committed against him. He hopes that this wave of publicity will cause a public outcry, which will result in the impeachment of various US presidents and the awarding of "$20 billions" in compensation for the damages he and his family have suffered. Another source says:

Frank believes that he and his family have been filmed for years now without their knowledge and the show has aired as "The Richest Family". He found out that he was a star (and appeared on the cover of Newsweek, Time, etc.) because California Correctional Officers who were really movie stars who were really KGB agents told him---through ESP. In fact, nearly all the movie stars have ESP. Frank is not from another galaxy and never contends to be. He hasn't even visited them. He is aware of them (possibly) through ESP being sent to him by Soviet ex-presidents (alive and dead/resurrected) and KGB agents. Clinton, Hillary, and even Chelsea are "guiltied" of being in collusion with the first 12 galaxies away from our galaxy, while Frank is being aided by the Zegnotronic (120 galaxies away).

Frank Chu’s interests include NASA, flying saucers, rocket vacations, Benjamin Franklin, Christianity, second salaries, androids, and past and current political events.

Frank Chu is a local hero, and has local watering hole 12 Galaxies named in his honor.

Anyone interested in hiring Mr. Chu can find his resume here.

Impeach at the Beach!

Thanks to global warming, it was a lovely summer day at Ocean Beach. Hundreds, perhaps a thousand or two, turned up to spell out "IMPEACH!" in a media stunt.


The Code Pink ladies were out early with coffee. I tried to grab a cup, but they wanted a $1 donation to fund some march on Washington or something.



About an hour before show time, the crowds looked pretty sparse.


Twenty minutes before show time, the "A" in "IMPEACH!" still looked pretty thinly populated.


Fortunately, some people fill up more space than others.


"Bush thinks you're an idiot." Let's prove him right!


Tin Foil Hats out in force.


The local ABC 7 news chopper.


It wouldn't be a San Francisco freakshow without Crazy Chinese Business Suit Guy (dressed down a bit for the weekend).



Osama & George, two peas in a pod.


Unaware that Varones had the event covered, Bush sent a spy plane to monitor the dissidents.


There's an asshole in every crowd.


The Code Pink truck.


Success!


The stunt went well. Expect to see aerial shots in the newspapers and on ABC 7 tonight.

More nice pics here.

Impeachment flash mob stunt tomorrow!

See you there:

On Saturday, January 6, 2007 (just two days after the new US Congress convenes), 1,200 people will gather for an impeachment event in Nancy Pelosi’s back yard — on Ocean Beach in San Francisco.

Early that morning, in 100-foot letters stretching 450 feet across the sand, volunteers from the Beach Impeach Project will outline the message:

I M P E A C H !

At 10:30, the attendees will arrive and lay their bodies down inside the message’s lettering. At 11 a.m. a helicopter will arrive overhead and photographers will record the 1,200 bodies in the sand — “IMPEACH!” — with the San Francisco skyline and the Golden Gate Bridge in the background.

I'm not sure who we're trying to impeach, but come along anyway. It will be a hoot!

NY Times to fire Barney Calame

It's about time. The New York Times has a position called "Public Editor," which is supposed to be someone who will respond to readers' concerns about inaccuracies, biases, and ethical transgressions at the Times.

Unfortunately, for the last few years, this role has been filled by a doofus named Barney Calame, who approves of or ignores virtually everything the Times editors do and ignores reader concerns.

Instead of hiring an independent, effective Public Editor in his place, though, the Times will eliminate the position entirely. Why waste money continuing the ludicrous pretense that this is an objective, honest, unbiased news source?

Love this quote from the New York Observer:

Mr. Okrent [Calame's predecessor] was a sharp critic who raised hackles and then won respect during his 18-month term. In contrast, Mr. Calame has been a bit more like that other Barney, the friendly purple dinosaur—and not entirely unlike Snuffleupagus, the once-invisible creature of Sesame Street. The readers were Big Bird, and we could see and hear him—but did he exist to anyone inside The Times?

Good riddance messages can be sent to public@nytimes.com.

Happy New Year!

Stocks up. Dollar down. Gold up. Emerging markets up big.

It's a nice start to the year.

Homosexuality cured; now there's a tougher nut to crack

As Varones reports below, scientists are well on the way to ridding us of the scourge of homosexuality. Thanks be to God!

Little good will this do Varones, however; witness here a snapshot of our fearless editor at home...

Science breakthrough could lead to cure for homosexuality

This is going to be an ethical dilemma:

SCIENTISTS are conducting experiments to change the sexuality of “gay” sheep in a programme that critics fear could pave the way for breeding out homosexuality in humans.

The technique being developed by American researchers adjusts the hormonal balance in the brains of homosexual rams so that they are more inclined to mate with ewes.

It raises the prospect that pregnant women could one day be offered a treatment to reduce or eliminate the chance that their offspring will be homosexual. Experts say that, in theory, the “straightening” procedure on humans could be as simple as a hormone supplement for mothers-to-be, worn on the skin like an anti-smoking nicotine patch.

The research, at Oregon State University in the city of Corvallis and at the Oregon Health and Science University in Portland, has caused an outcry. Martina Navratilova, the lesbian tennis player who won Wimbledon nine times, and scientists and gay rights campaigners in Britain have called for the project to be abandoned.

Navratilova defended the “right” of sheep to be gay. She said: “How can it be that in the year 2006 a major university would host such homophobic and cruel experiments?” She said gay men and lesbians would be “deeply offended” by the social implications of the tests.

I wouldn't choose the hormone treatment. I think gay sheep would be pretty funny to have around. But there are a lot of parents out there who would opt for the cure.

For some people, this is 1938 all over again:

Peter Tatchell, the gay rights campaigner, said: “These experiments echo Nazi research in the early 1940s which aimed at eradicating homosexuality. They stink of eugenics. There is a danger that extreme homophobic regimes may try to use these experimental results to change the orientation of gay people.”

Hey, there are already ways for parents to influence the sex of the child. Is it that big a leap to influence the sexuality?

This reminds me a lot of the deaf activists opposed to cochlear implants to cure deafness. How do you define what is a condition that should be cured and what is normal? I'd fix deafness, but probably not poofery. But there's plenty of room for argument.