12.28.2008

Ain't That America...

From the sports desk at W.C. Varones world headquarters comes this - does anything exemplify America more than the National Football League? The regular season ended today and a few results stick out to me:
  • The Ford (as in the car company) family owned Detroit Lions became the first team in NFL history to go 0-16. They were pure failures, and the architect of this achievement was Matt Millen, an NFL broadcaster hired (and fired a few months ago) for his first management position--as the CEO and President of this silly organization. Since his arrival in 2001, the team went 31-84. That's easily the worst management record for that number of games in NFL history. Given it was the Ford Motor Company's brain trust that hired this guy, this result is not surprising at all. What's surprising is that Congress didn't make a law that the Lions play in the Super Bowl anyway.
  • The 11-5 New England Patriots did not make the playoffs, to determine the best team in the league, while the 8-8 Chargers did make the playoffs. It seems odd to me to not allow the best teams to compete for the championship. Huh, rewarding organizations that don't achieve as much as other organizations. I'm smelling something here.
  • Every year the best players go to Hawaii to play in a meaningless circle jerk to celebrate their greatness. An All-Star game if you will. Well this year Brett Favre will be one of the six quarterbacks playing in the game. His stats for the year are mediocre at best. He ranks 8th of 16 in the AFC and 18th of 32 in the NFL. The 1st, 2nd, and 5th ranked quarterbacks in the NFL will not be playing in this game of the best. Again let's reward the ones who aren't as good. Eli Manning will also be playing in this event and he's ranked 14th.
  • Finally, our local powerhouse, the Oakland "Commitment to Excrement" Raiders also did something that has never been done in the NFL before. They lost eleven games in six straight seasons. Not even the Lions managed that. Now the funny thing is that before the year started they paid ridiculous money for broke-down, over-the-hill, and slow players. They gave Javon Walker a guaranteed $16m contract when he was obviously not good anymore. He caught 15 passes this year (that's BAD). They signed Deangelo Hall for what they say is $24m guaranteed but cut him after eight games and gave him a million per game for his troubles. By the way, I don't understand how a contract has $24m guaranteed but then he doesn't get it, anyway...
I'd be fine with all of this if $0 government dollars were spent to support this league. But instead, BILLIONS of tax dollars are transferred from the population into the pockets of these owners so they can be "competitive." Oakland got royally screwed in dealing with Al Davis and getting him to come back after he left for L.A. And now he's leaving for Fremont, California.

My point is the NFL exemplifies our government and its bailout system very well. It is a show of the redistribution of wealth to the wealthy.

Besides, to watch a game is utterly painful. It takes you about 3 hours to watch what amounts to 40 minutes of real action. You spend more time watching ads for products you must have, like Ford F150s, than you do watching the game.

...little pinks house for you and me.

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